Typical Phone Conversation: Installment 1
Vacuum Cleaner Store Clerk: Vacuum world! We suck for you! How can I help you!?
(I know, you're thinking why is the Vacuum store clerk so bizarrely chipper with all those exclamation points and the ridiculous slogan. It's because this little story is set in LA where every clerk is freakishly nice just in case you can get them the acting job they left Iowa for 10 years ago only to end up slinging useless crap to rich cunts with dogs hanging out of their Louis Vuitton bags. Their optimism knows no bounds.)
Tara Reid: Um I'm all puffy. I need lipo.
Vacuum Cleaner Store Clerk: Certainly Miss Reid. I'll just go pick up the Voodoo priestess and we'll be right over.
3 hours later...
(I know, you're thinking why is the Vacuum store clerk so bizarrely chipper with all those exclamation points and the ridiculous slogan. It's because this little story is set in LA where every clerk is freakishly nice just in case you can get them the acting job they left Iowa for 10 years ago only to end up slinging useless crap to rich cunts with dogs hanging out of their Louis Vuitton bags. Their optimism knows no bounds.)
Tara Reid: Um I'm all puffy. I need lipo.
Vacuum Cleaner Store Clerk: Certainly Miss Reid. I'll just go pick up the Voodoo priestess and we'll be right over.
3 hours later...
posted by Sarah at 3:26 AM
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